I'm in love!

Is that a crazy thing for a parent to say? I'm in love with my child. I'm in love with my children. I look at them and my heart swells. I need to kiss their little dirty faces until they're smooshed. I love each of them the same and differently at the same time.

Cole is such a precocious little snuggler. He talks like it's nobody's business, has an opinion on everything (hmm, sounds a little familiar) and is not afraid to tell anybody who will listen that he is right about everything. He gives the best hugs ever! He loves art. He colors and makes pictures everyday. I swear the kid can draw better than I can, granted that doesn't set the bar very high. He never meets a stranger. I've tried to explain "stranger-danger" to him and he doesn't understand, part of me hopes he never does and he keeps the innocence. If a cute little blond boy starts chatting you up at the grocery store, chances are you've met my Cole.

Katie is such a girlie girl. She is my princess. She loves to have her hair fixed, wants make up on, loves dresses and is just so damn cute I can barely stand it. Every morning, she tells me 1 or 2. That is how she wants her hair fixed, either a ponytail/top-knot or piggy-tails. Now that her hair is getting a little longer, I'm going to try and give her more options. She is adamant about her clothing, she will not wear something she doesn't want to wear. She's not even 3 yet! Seriously! She loves showing off her earrings. There is something about the way she carries herself. I will catch myself just staring at her. She is beautiful and cute at the same time. Thank GOD she has 2 brothers. One older and one much bigger twin. Then there is always Daddy after that.

Sean, he is just the man. He is so independent and focused. He will take 2 separate toys and put them together to make a new game. He is happy to play with his brother or sister or just do his own thing. He is so sweet and loving, especially towards Katie. Cole had a hat that Katie wanted. Sean just walked over and snatched it off his head and gave it to Katie. We are trying to teach him he can't just take anything Katie wants. He is such a bruiser! He takes knocks like it's nothing. He plays hard too, he doesn't understand not everyone can take a hit like he can.

So yes, I'm in love. I feel happy and complete. I find myself grabbing a child to hug or kiss whenever my arms are empty, smelling their hair, or feeling their sweet little hands on my cheek. I'm just trying to enjoy every day that I can right now. Before I know it, I'll be hitting the preteen years and oh boy!

Not so angry anymore

Sorry I scared the hell out of a bunch of you. I leave off with how angry and filled with rage I am and then didn't blog for months. I have been reprimanded by several people. Please accept my humble apologies. Also please feel free to call me out on any typos you may find. I have the spell check turned on, but it does not seem to be working.
Let's see, since I last truly blogged a lot has happened. I am at peace with myself and the cancer. I'm trying to find all the positive in having cancer that I can. First and foremost, if someone in my house was going to have cancer, thank you God for letting it be me. I am a strong woman, but I am not strong enough to watch my children suffer. God bless all the parents who are dealing with this on a daily basis, you are at the top of my prayers. Cancer is blessing in that you find out how much you are loved as they carry you through you weakest moments.
OK, now on to the fun stuff. I just posted a quick list of funny moments in the past months. Oddly enough I wrote that months ago and forgot to publish it. Since then Katie got her ears pierced! She was sucha little champ about it too. She didn't cry or yell. She just told the lady afterward, "You hurt me" then hopped off the chair and said Sean's turn! Sean is getting much better at using his words. Sometimes he just speaks his little Sean-speak, and others it sounds like an 8 year old with perfect language skills. I just never know with him. I love when we have a conversation, I may not understand but I do. He tells me things and pauses with a sigh and checks to make sure I am looking him directly in the eye. Sometimes he'll reach up and caress me check so sweetly as he talks. He'll continue talking looking around and then cut his eyes over in the cutest little way. Some nights he'll talk to me like that for 5-10 minutes. My theory is between Katie and Cole, he can't get a word in so he saves it up for bedtime and is recounting his day to me. Cole is loving kindergarten. LOVES it. He has a girlfriend, of course. Her name is Blair with golden hair, blue eyes and she always has her hair fixed and loves to wear dresses. They are coloring buddy. A new girl started in his class and really took a liking to Cole. He said to her, I'm sorry but I already have a girlfriend. He told me at home, "I only like HOT girls, not just pretty ones!" I told Alex the story so when he got home he asked Cole about it so he could hear the story. Cole added on this time, "I only want 2 girlfriends, not too many!"

Cute and funny things over the past few months...

1. Cole had just woke up in the morning and he put on fresh underwear and shorts. I was helping him buckle his belt when he said. "Mom! I have a statue in my pants!" I realized he was talking about morning wood.
2. I stepped on my dog's tongue!!! He was licking the floor at the same time I stepped backwards. I was barefoot and it was the weirdest feeling ever. Poor Bandit.
3. As you get older, never trust a fart!
4. I was letting the twins watch the Disney Channel. Katie was watching Hannah Montana, Sean picked up the remote and handed it to me saying."'No. I pass."
5. Cole: We live in the United Steaks. If you say steak, it's what we eat. If you say United Steak, it's where we live.
6. So I was reading CNN, and saw on the right "popular on Facebook" and I thought, why do I have to be popular on FB to read those stories?
7. Sean dancing around the living room in Katie's princess heels to the song Disco Queen, that boy has got some moves!
8. Sean took a matchbox car, shoved it into my cleavage, put his hands in the air...Ta Da!
9. Katie farted on my lap, I asked her what do you say? (Expecting her to say 'cuse me) but no, my daughter says, "All mine!"
10. We learned the hard way. Do NOT watch Tosh.O when the kids are awake. We thought, oh it can't be that bad, they'll bleep anything bad. Obviously, we had not watched the show before. I grabbed both kids next to me and covered eyes and ears in a flash. We turned it off immediately and Alex and I both about had a heart attack. If you are curious, they were giving a definition of "docking". Alex and I never heard the word in this context before. He and I are so niave, we thought computer docking station. UH,NO!
11. On that note, we found a show that is funny as hell! It's called Tosh.O. I suggest DVR and waiting until all children are in bed. Wait until your teenagers are in bed too. God forbid they think of new stupid crap to do.